2.14.2010

Confession Saturday One Day Late


I confess:

--I went to real confession this week (modeling desired behavior for The Bean), and it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. It probably helps that the confessor is one of my dear friends. I confess, I always feel like I have to have a good enough sin -- you know, sinful enough -- whenever I go to confession. At this point in my life, the old standbys from childhood and adolescence don't cut it: I'm not mean to my brothers or disobedient to my parents anymore. Looking into the deep, dark, truthful mirror isn't always fun, and the sins these days seem a lot deeper and more damaging, but overall I'm glad I went.

--I had nothing to say to The Bean afterwards when I asked him how it went for him and he said, "Well, it was fine, Mom. I mean, it's only a belief so it didn't really affect me." Which would also explain why my jaw dropped last night as we returned from 4:30 Mass and he said, " That was GREAT!" I confess, so far my strategy for The Bean's religious formation is to keep my mouth shut, go to Mass whenever possible, and try to model living a good, kind, thoughtful, godly life.

--I am physically incapable of typing the year 2010 without typos, backspacing, and trying again. And again. And again. I confess, it wouldn't bother me so much if I didn't have to type it pretty much every day.

--I had two things wrong in my Pride and Prejudice and Chocolate post. (1) Persuasion is not on Masterpiece tonight; Northanger Abbey is. Persuasion airs next Sunday, February 21. (2) There are no pinafores in Pride and Prejudice. That must have been some other Jane Austen book-cum-movie, maybe Sense and Sensibility.

--The Olympic Anthem makes me cry. What is that? I mean, does it all go back to watching the Miracle On Ice in the 1980 Winter Olympics when the U.S. hockey team beat the Soviet Union? Or is it something else?

--I confess, I was a nervous wreck on Friday when my favorite high schooler climbed up on my roof to rake some of the snow off. I was so nervous that I called his mom, KK, to ask if I should run right out there and tell him to get-down-right-now-for-god's-sake-before-he-hurt-himself. KK was very reassuring and promised me he had done much more dangerous things and lived to tell the tale. I have learned to let go, she said. I confess, I am glad to have wise women in my life whose children are older than mine, and from whom I can learn things like how to let go.

--I didn't write at all last week. I slept in every morning. I completed all my many household tasks with patience and devotion. I let the writing desk sit alone but, I hope, not lonely (I confess, I left my desk lamp on all day every day as a symbolic message to myself: You may not be writing this week, but we'll leave the light on for ya.). I confess, when I'm not writing it is much easier to get enough sleep and to run the household smoothly. My days were less stressful. On the other hand, I know what happens when I go too long with out writing. So yesterday morning, I was back at it and have four new drafts to work on. Yahooooooo!

--I confess, I feel like a nerd for downloading this font that is supposed to look like Jane Austen's handwriting (based on her letters):



Happy Valentine's Day to you, and may you find some Whimsy somewhere in your week.

Oh, and here's a little something just in case you need a good cry:

3 comments:

CitricSugar said...

I am right there with you with misty-ness. That "I Believe" song gets me all the time.

I haven't gone to confession since Grade 8 so Bean's still ahead of me even if he's "unaffected", which, forgive me, made me laugh out loud. Seems like he's finding his own spiritual balance, though, and good for you for laying the path and then "letting go" so he can find it on his own.

Pinafores - Sense and Sensibility for sure. I distinctly remember Emma Thompson coming in from the garden and being unbuttoned hastily before Mr. Ferrars comes bursting through the door....

Ms. WK said...

Let's hear it for the nerds.

I confess, it makes me feel closer to you when I read your confessions.

Unknown said...

OMG, your standard childhood confessions were exactly the same as mine!

Is it okay to model living a good, kind, thoughtful, godly life and not go to church? I am still thinking about that.